It starts with awareness.
Using seemingly harmless addictions to fill you up like food, exercise, Netflix, social media, etc., might not seem like a big deal, but when you turn anything external into a coping mechanism for your internal discontent, it becomes a crutch. You don’t want one of those. You want to stand on your own two feet. You ought to strive to be strong enough to do that.
The goal here is to fill the “void” (or the parts of you that feel “less than”) with ways that help you to embrace and love YOU as you are with the intention to grow into what you want for yourself.
Then fill yourself up in real ways like:
- Prayer and meditation…
- Mindset practice…
- Moving your body…
- Journaling…
- Getting in nature…
- Talking to friends…
- Maybe even seeing a therapist?!
Avoid filling yourself up with:
- Irrational expectations…
- Superficial things…
- Junk food…
- Zoning out…
- Or living vicariously through others.
You are your own beautiful person with your own beautiful gifts just waiting to be explored and shared.
And repeat.
You will fall off the wagon, the rails, whatever you’re on, but you can always get back on. You can also learn how to fall off less with a technique I call “stop.” My therapist had me do this when I kept getting in my own way and it really helped me overcome my self-destructive behavior.
All you have to do is verbally say “stop” when you catch yourself in a negative thought pattern or behavior. It interrupts your internal negative nancy on the spot. It will give you just enough space to redirect your thoughts or actions. I’ve even heard of people pairing the “stop” tactic with a rubber band snap on the wrist or a leg slap. Whatever works for you!
The result.
If you do the work, and you are consistent, you will experience a more intentional life that fills all the voids. You’ll be happier, more relaxed, and more able to enjoy the moments of your life because you are not chasing external fulfillment. Your friends and family will take notice too. They’ll enjoy your presence with them, not your distracted energy that normally distances those very relationships.
You will have a full cup to pour from. You will finally be enough.
I believe in you.
